Masters of Harmony

"War Horses of the Chorus" Series, No. 3: Gene Clements

Kirt Thiesmeyer, Jul 18, 2007

(No. 3 in an erratic series preserving the history of the Masters of Harmony and highlighting the contributions of illustrious members most in need of preservation.)

Gene Clements, a Golden Oldie in the Barbershop Harmony Society (35 years or more – now 41), and holder of six gold medals with the Masters of Harmony, joined MOH the same day that Dr. Greg Lyne did and has been a faithful member of the bass section ever since. He brought with him a stint in the US Navy, a business administration degree from the University of California, Berkeley, and 20 years of chorus directing, both Sweet Adelines and SPEBSQSA types. Now retired from field underwriting for State Farm Insurance, Gene enjoys fishing, stamp collecting, barbershopping and his first love, Wanda (a former Sweet Adeline with a third place International chorus medal, an original member of the Harmony Sweethearts and winner of the 2003 Alice Blue Gown Award).

A Colorado native and lifetime singer, Gene is recovering from a nasty bout with lymphoma, and all the related needle sticks, chemotherapy and enervation that entails. His cheery and upbeat attitude has nevertheless endeared him to the riser folk that he will soon rejoin, and he was recently seen at our San Diego show, answering questions about the Masters while Wanda did her usual thing at the CD table.

War Horse Interview – conducted on the diving board of their palatial estate in Mission Viejo, Gene and Wanda, married for 51 years, graciously offered us a cream soda and the warm friendship for which they are both known, as we began with some gentle probing about his recent illness:

Masters of Harmony: Yo, Baldy! Is it OK if we call you “Baldy”? Gene Clements: It takes one to know one. Besides, in six weeks mine will have all grown back, whereas, in your case . . .

MOH: You really know how to hurt a guy. But we know you have just come through a lengthy ordeal, all that chemistry. Are you still radioactive? GC: Wanda says I glow in the dark. But that started years ago.

MOH: How about medical marijuana to relieve depression? GC: No. I’ve always been one of those guys who sees the bong as half full.

MOH: So what’s your overall impression of the experience? GC: If it weren’t for the honor, I could have done without it. But the hormone therapy is the worst, with the side effects.

MOH: Like what? GC: Well, I get these hot flashes and feel bloated; and whenever I get lost I have this inexplicable urge to ask for directions.

Wanda (interjecting): And I think he’s begun to enjoy shopping with me!

MOH: Any dietary restrictions? GC: I can eat anything that doesn’t eat me first.

MOH: We suppose you have scads of memories from the “good old days”? GC: It’s hard to be nostalgic when you don’t remember anything.

MOH: We know you’re just joking. After all, aren’t you proud of having earned all the lines in your face? GC: Yes, except when they set off the bar code reader at Albertson’s.

MOH: Hoosier fav’rite barbershopper? GC: That would have to be David Wright; he changes keys more often than a locksmith.

MOH: So, how do you amuse yourself in retirement? GC: Well, I’ve been a philatelist since 1944.

MOH: Does Wanda know? GC: It means stamp collecting.

MOH: Oh. You’re one of those people whose favorite thing is to look at cancelled postage? GC: You can learn a lot about history and geography . . . but there’s no sense trying to educate a moron.

MOH: That remark went over my head. Well, you’ll soon be using your toothbrush for its original purpose, instead of for combing your hair. GC: I appreciate your good wishes.

MOH: You seem to be a quiet, self-effacing guy. What do you have to say to your many fans and admirers? GC: The second mouse gets the cheese.

Gene drives 90 miles R/T each week for his MOH infusion, and finds fulfillment as makeup coordinator (“putting our best face forward”), as a member of both the Nominating and Awards committees, and as chapter safety officer, stemming from his insurance experience. Gene currently holds the Vocal Production chair at Masters University and is a FWD Bachelor of Harmony. He has been an area counselor, chapter coach and chapter counselor, as the appellations have changed over the years, and he is now Division Vice President for SoCal East, as well. In 1996 and 2003, he was named FWD Chapter Counselor of the Year. Gene and Wanda shared the MOH Harmony Union Award in 2006.

If you’re ever feeling down, Gene will buoy you up with a broad grin and an encouraging word.

[The foregoing interview has not been approved by the Food and Drug Administration or by any other agency of state or federal government. Readers are advised to consult their personal physicians prior to reading – oops, too late! Had this been a real interview, Wanda would have pitched me off the diving board, if they really had a pool.]

Next exciting, unsuspecting and imaginary interviewee – Doug Maddox!